I just wanted to write a little about what this service means to me and my family. The team provided an amazing support through the darkest time in my life. After having my first born darling daughter die nearly four years ago at 19 weeks my whole world fell apart. The staff at middlemore where I delivered Tessa were somewhat robotic and less than understanding of the trauma of losing a little one and without the selfless service from Baby Loss NZ....I really believe I could have lost more....my marriage, myself and my sanity. Sarah and her family and the committee became a tireless and constant support. Not just in the weeks after but the years after our loss. Through their encouragement and love, special memories and momentos to honour our little one was encouraged and aided. Something that will always be cherished. In a time where everyone seemed to want me to forget and quickly move on (which just makes the pain deeper) this amazing team made me feel normal and my feelings natural which helped the laborious process. There were days I felt I couldn't go on and the phone calls, emails and coffee meetings were an amazing to help heal a gapping hole in our life. Through the special memorial days, balloon releases and pop in coffees, I was able to work through overwhelming grief, fear and eventually find the courage to try again and have a baby. I am delighted to share we have a beautiful baby boy! While the grief of a child dying is never easy, this essential service in our community is sadly necessary to fill the huge gap our medical system leaves to help grieving families cope and reform some essence of a life after losing their child. I pray that their service is supported and financed so that other poor families can be supported as ours has been. Thank you Baby Loss NZ. You're amazing! Chrissy Frampton
I would like to thank Baby Loss NZ for the amazing things that they did for me at the toughest time of my life. When your life has just been turned upside down and you have all these questions been asked that you thought you would never need to think of answering. Where do you want the funerals, what flowers, cremation or burial? The last thing on your mind is how am i going to make these memories last forever. Baby Loss NZ offers great support as well as a great service . I had not heard of them until the day i lost my baby at 39 weeks. Baby Loss NZ were right by my side, support to help answer all the difficult questions and were on call for when i had given birth so that they could be there soon to take castings of my angels hands and feet as we only have them for a short time before we say goodbye forever. I have no idea what i would have done without the support of Baby Loss NZ. They are a GREAT organization. Briar Pope ( Mother of Angel Olivia )
I have received the special memorie service from Baby Loss NZ they support help me to heal if i miss steven alot I can hold the memories these memories helps our families alot to heal andvto remember they lost children Baby Loss NZ I hope you can continue doing this for the families thanks alot for your soecial gift and support . Mienkie Van Der Westhuizen
We would like to thank Baby Loss NZ from the bottom of our hearts for the memories you made for my husband, daughters and I, which will help us to remember our wee boy, Jacob. We were not prepared for the loss of Jacob. When we went into labour we were excited at the imminent arrival of our precious son. Given a choice I would rather have my baby boy to hold and see grow, but the cruel twists of life left us without that dream. Your tangible memory making service gave us something of Jacob to hold for life. Had it not been for Baby Loss NZ giving us this gift, we would have been left with only the shock tainted, blurry memories of the day our son was born; and died. These castings, hand / foot prints and the photos you created for us, at a time when we were unable to do this (or even think to do this) for ourselves are now something we treasure, adore and can hold forever. I hope you can continue to offer this service to other families who are unfortunate enough to find themselves in a position to need them. What these memories mean to us, is immeasurable and I can only hope others may be able to find some comfort in the memories you create, as we have done. Thank you, Sandy & John Rothery.
After living with the very private pain of loss of a little boy nearly 40 years ago I never even got to hold, my little angel became real and talked about when I met Baby Loss NZ. The strength, dedication, love, determination to give to others in such pain, from Baby Loss NZ is beyond words. It saddens us all to know how much depression, anger, illness and suicide has been bought on by unresolved grief in our world before souls like those at Baby Loss NZ reached out. In a world that can very harsh, its so healing to have those that care so very much. Then when my daughter went on to have now lost 3 babies, the strength learnt from Baby Loss NZ has helped guide us through the other side..well nearly. I know know what any of us would do without Baby Loss NZ. I also share, often, the wonderful support available through my job in the medical world, that Baby Loss NZ is there for you, should you want it. Thank you really doesn't say enough for someone recognising and acknowledging the loss of a such a young and more than precious soul to the extent that Baby Loss NZ does, when everyone else is even too scared to look you eyes for that extra minute.
Its been just over 3 years now since Leyton has passed, and yet I remember it like it was yesterday… this is sometimes a good thing or a bad thing depending on the day and the memory. At the time, I didn’t really think much about Baby Loss NZ, who they were or what they did. All I knew was my lil boy was gone and didn’t know what to do or how I was feeling. I received the CARE PACK – which I think was GENIUS, I may not have expressed my appreciation for it at the time, but now I can…. The one thing that reached me at that time, and let me tell you not much did… was reading the note on the lid, stating the Name of the person who personally did my care pack, who was in the SAME position I was in. Who made me feel that there was someone who KNEW how I felt when I thought no-one did. At that low point, you needed that…. I was barely holding on, I couldn’t turn to anyone. That detail that might have seem insignificant to others, made a DIFFERENCE to me… THANK YOU Baby Loss NZ. I really wish I got Leyton’s hands and feet casted, just to hold it in my hands…That would have been such a blessing. The casting is very special and I commend you on the idea. People don’t realize at the time, but when your memories are starting to go a little fuzzy… Just the fact it feels like your touching him……well it’s just magic. It takes VERY SPECIAL PEOPLE to run such a organisation and I for one appreciate all the work you have done for all of our families. GOD BLESS from Leyton and his parents. Lei Timu
hey, I wish we had been offered your support when our grand daughter died…our daughter was given your lovely gift bag and a pamphlet, but no verbal offer and she was so focused on the then and now that she didnt get time to read the pamphlets til afterwards…We are eternally grateful for the ink pad that enabled us to have Grace’s hand and footprints…but it would have been fantastic to have someone with us as a family who had been there, done that so to speak… we probably would have looked at doing the casts as well…The only complaint I had was the fact that we asked for the Catholic priest to be called and he never replied to his pager…apparently he did that more than once during the week…and also the bereavement support person kept referring to Grace as “her” even after we asked her to acknowledge Grace as a baby and with her name…she still referred to Grace as “her” or “the baby”…two very small things in the scheme of things, and we still managed to get Grace baptised (albeit protestant) but just some feedback…..the after care we have had from Baby Loss NZ since reading the pamphlet and making contact has been amazing….thank you… - Teresa Burt
We lost our baby boy at around 22 weeks Stillborn.. I was in Dunedin at the time, so didn’t have Baby Loss NZ support straight away. Which i wish i did. I always had it in my head once you get past 3 months you are safe, never thought about stillborn or that it would happen to me. Baby Loss NZ have been amazing. It took a lot of courage for me to contact them and to go along to a meeting. Which now im glad i did. I had so many emotions going on in my head and Baby Loss NZ listened and helped me grieve and they are still giving me on-going support today. Without Baby Loss NZ i don't think i would be as strong as i am today, knowing that if i need to talk they are only an email/phone call away and Sarah you are amazing. You have listened to everything i have had to say and supported me. If people are reading this and wondering whether or not to contact Baby Loss NZ.. go for it.. your not alone and im still shocked on how many people have gone through similar situations. We support each other. I want to say thank you to Sarah and Baby Loss NZ for the support you have given me and my family.—Jenny Anderton
We lost our baby boy at 30 weeks a little over 2 and a half years ago. Without the support of Baby Loss NZ and the ladies that ‘are’ Baby Loss NZ, my life could have been very different. The care pack that was provided to us at the time of losing our son was absolutely invaluable. It gave us the ability to make special memories when neither of us could function or think for ourselves. I have only ever met the women who ‘are’ Baby Loss NZ once, but have been in contact via e-mails, facebook and phone from the beginning of this journey and for that I will be forever grateful. They understand, when everyone else tries to, but can’t. They ‘get’ what you feel like, and it is ok to feel however you do with them. The monthly newsletters are wonderful for keeping our babies memories alive and gives me a place to reflect. I have tears running down my face as I write this, as I often do when I think of my son but without the love and support of Baby Loss NZ I could not/can not live my life as I do. Thank you so very much for you continued support, love acceptance x - Guinevere Malpass
Baby Loss NZ, even thou u didnt no the whanau u sure made ur present felt that the whanau made use feel so welcome that is what whanau is about the love and support when needed and use made the whanau feel alot more comfortable in thea tym of need so thanx use very much b good 2 c the casting of our moko moko her beautiful hands and feet wat a treasure for da whanau - Judith Matthews
Kia ora ki a koutou e Baby Loss NZ arohanui ki a koutou mo to koutou mahi. Kia tuturu to koutou kupu ki runga. What a wonderful wonderful journey we all experienced. Sad & unforgettable as it is, we will never never forget our moko. Thanks to your organisation you have made this part of our journey that much more memorable by making these molds of our lil butterfly’s hands & feet as well as photos for our whanau & Genine to treasure forever.. Even though our moko is gone in body, her spirit lives on in her mummy & her whanau whom loves her dearly. The time that we were ALL in shock & disbelief you guys took over & did the things that was far from our minds at that time, taking memorable moments our our moko as in all honesty WE would never had thought of doing something like that as I’m sure the rest of our whanau would no doubt agree, we would have been thinking that what you guys were doing at the time was not within our Maori tikanga, but on reflection WE are so so grateful that someone/s thought ahead & produced these beautiful taonga of our lil butterfly. I’m so glad that these were done as we would have had nothing but her spirit & our love for her to comfort us…. Thank you so much Baby Loss NZ for giving back to our family with these taonga that can be displayed with love & pride… Your the best!!!! - Lucille Cooper
Kia Ora Baby Loss NZ. What would we have done without your organisation, your empathy, your precious taonga, your beautiful creation, of keeping those special memories, tucked in our memory bank, forever. For Genine, you have allowed her to express her loss and grief in so many ways, by providing the tools in the taonga Baby Loss NZ gave for her. The whanau have displayed this many ways. We will always be here for Genine, and will never in a lifetime forget our precious Butterfly. Thank you Baby Loss NZ for making yourself available in all in our society. Accepting is very hard, but the journey with Baby Loss NZ, helps to ease alot of mamai. - Elsie Rawiri-Rowe
Kia Ora to you all at Baby Loss NZ. Thank you so much for all the things you have done for my sister. Yes like my aunty explained above at our time kof grief, no one would have ever thought to do what you had done that night of my darling niece parting. I too was involved in making beautiful handprints and cuddling our darling whilst her moulds were being taken. As i entered the room, at first glance, i too was stand-offish at the sight of two lovely women doing this sort of thing to my niece. But that all changed when i saw my Uncle Mike (Koro to Te Tori), sitting there with the biggest smile on his face as these two women worked there magic. To you two women, words can’t express how happy i am that you have shared your talents and made our grieving process a little easier for us to bear. To have experienced and have some important in all that happened that sad night made me realise that her memory will live on forever in our hearts but now where ever i may go, i will have a constant reminder of her beautifulness where i may go. Thank you for being so delicate with my darling niece. And yes, throughout the whole process, my darling niece did look like she was only sleeping and yes how i wish it was so. Again i have to thank you all for your help, your words of wisdom in my time of grief and yes our treasured taonga which we mayy shortly be displaying. THANK YOU THANK YOU AND THANK YOU AGAIN…… - Michelle Matthews
I recently lost twins, at seven weeks gestation. Within a period of 24 hours, I found out I was pregnant, I was losing the pregnancy, and it was twins. Without the love and support that my husband and I received from Baby Loss NZ, I don’t think I would still be here. I now have six baby angels, and losing the twins has nearly cost me my sanity, and almost my life. I owe Baby Loss NZ so very much. Your support has meant so much, not only to me, but to my whole family. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. xxxx - Megan Lee